Lake and Sumter Style Magazine
11:42 pm EST
Tuesday, November 30, 2021

Mister, tear down that wall

Men need to effectively communicate when stressful situations arise.

For most of your adulthood, life has been one smooth ride. You were gainfully employed and now you’re happily retired in The Villages, better known to some as the “Disney World for Adults.” Sharing that home with you is a beautiful, loving wife. You’re blessed with a great circle of friends and socialize with them regularly.

In recent months, though, things have spiraled out of control. Your 93-year-old mother has run out of money and needs a place to live. Your oldest son is going through a nasty divorce and frequently calls you for advice. Your best friend is battling cancer and you do yard work at his home each week so his wife can focus on being a caregiver.  

Pressure, stress and anxiety begin mounting. How will you address this? If you’re a man, you will likely fail to communicate your worries and concerns to family members, friends, and counselors. Men have a wall—it’s called pride. That wall contains five feet of concrete and 10 layers of steel. We protect this wall to protect pride; that’s how we’re built and wired. 

Where men commonly fail is not being able to communicate their problems effectively. We carry burdens on our shoulders, and at some point, the burden becomes too much causing us to break down. Men need to have an effective outlet to deal with adversity in life.

The key is finding the proper coping mechanism for you. Every man needs an outlet to deal with problems. Here are some ideas you can explore.

  • Call local churches and find out whether they have an available life coach or other licensed professional with whom you can share problems with. Perhaps you can talk to several life coaches or professionals before sticking with one who makes you the most comfortable. 
  • Ask around and see if there are local men’s groups. Maybe you’ll make a friend or two who are experiencing similar problems in life. You can openly share your problems and formulate solutions.
  • Find a golf group that meets on weekends. You can always chit-chat with someone while riding on the golf cart.
  • Simply take a walk in the woods and reflect on everything that’s troubling you. Getting away from our usual surroundings and enjoying new scenery can be healing. 

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